By Elizabeth
Given that this week is when Everything Ever is premiering on the major networks (well, almost), I thought it would be appropriate and logical to spend some time talking about pilot episodes. Specifically, how despite their being so important, they can often be straight-up awful. And why we need to get over it.
For everyone’s sake, I’m going to start by laying down a few parameters. I am talking about American television. I am talking about the pilot episodes that actually make it to air, not the shiny exciting ones you find on DVDs. I am not talking about half-hour sitcoms, because I Don’t Watch Them. And as always, the conclusions I make are based entirely on my own observation and experience.
So, why can pilots suck so much?
They Are Introductions Without Substance
There is, admittedly, a lot of pressure on pilot episodes. There are a LOT of things that have to get taken care of: character introduction, establishment of season/series-wide story arcs, plus an actual plot for the episode itself. And that third item is where shows tend to fall short, particularly in one-hour pilots. So much time is spent with “This character is so-and-so. They are related to this character in such-and-such way. Here is a display of their personal strengths. Here is a hint at their personal weaknesses. This is their house. This is their dog” that the central storyline tying the episode together is actually the lamest thing ever and, if there actually had been an entire forty minutes spent on just that, the result would be overwrought, simplistic, and just pretty embarrassing. For example:
• Past Life. If you missed this show, don’t worry about it. It is terrible. I’m only mentioning it because it is a great example of this failure. They spend so much time intro-ing the characters (who suck) that the actual case-solving is dwindled down to two Sudden Realizations and one Incidental Observation. Even if the premise of the show and nature of the case-solving (past-life regression to fight crime) wasn’t ridiculous, this would be awful.
• Life. You will rarely hear me say anything bad about this series, and I really don’t think the pilot is particularly awful, but. This pilot does commit the crime of over-expositioning. The case is so uncomplicated, clearly the same people could solve it in half the time any other episode. Convenient for introducing some wonderfully complex characters, less-than-successful at establishing the detectives as top-class investigators.
They Are Too Much
Another thing that happens is the opposite of the above. Instead of just letting one element be less spectacular and focusing on another, the writers instead try to do Everything At Once. Shitstorm commences, and by the end of the episode not only do you not know the names of half of the characters, you also can’t really remember the story, and you definitely have no idea what the important things you need to know for the rest of the series are. For example:
• Ok, so I actually can’t think of a great example right off the top of my head. I sort of remember having this reaction to 24, but that was a long time and a lot of season ago (and, let’s be honest, that’s just how all of 24 is).
They Are Deceptive
Pretty much the worst thing that happens is when you watch a pilot episode and get completely drawn into the show to the fact where you’re practically vibrating with excitement for the next seven days until a new episode, and then it is a huge letdown. I don’t just mean the second episode being bad – bad episodes happen, and that’s fine. I mean when the pilot episode is so exciting and so intriguing and so many things happen. And then the second episode (and the third, and the fourth) are simplistic, boring, and almost totally dry of story development. For example:
• When the first episode of a cop show is crazyinteresting and involves a serial killer with a personal vendetta against one of the main characters and it sets up all sorts of character arcs for the rest of the series, and then the next episode is a guy who murders his wife. (Specific examples: Rizzoli & Isles, CSI prime)
• Lost. The letdown from enthusiasm for the pilot episode (holy wow! plane crash! dead people! mysterious Island mysteries!) to the horrible realization that actually, most of the first season is going to be about them finding water, growing fruit, and building tents.
Not all pilot episodes are mediocre-at-best. I’d argue that most pilots for shows that are story- rather than premise-based (as in, 24 vs. standard cop shows) tend to be better, simply because there is actually a beginning to the story*. In procedurals, there isn’t much of a solid story arc, so the first episode is less a true beginning than an entrance into something already in progress – think leaving your driveway for a roadtrip vs. merging onto a freeway. That merging process is sometimes smooth and effective, and sometimes there’s a lot of starting and stopping and worrying about the double-decker bus barreling down the lane you’re trying to enter. This is where poorly-constructed, poorly-executed pilot episodes come in to play.
Part of the problem, I think, is expectation. A standard episode of a cop drama is just not effective as a pilot episode. So even if the episode-to-episode standard of a show is high, the expectations for pilots are too-high-er and therefore almost impossible to meet by usual methods. The important thing to remember is: Don’t Give Up After The Pilot. Accept that it has a 75% chance of being bad. Reserve judgment for at least one more episode before making up your mind about dedicating yourself to a new show or not – two or three more episodes would be better. Very few series hit it out of the ballpark from the get go. The first season is almost always a bit rickety, the first five episodes especially. What I look for in a pilot episode isn’t necessarily straightforward quality (although obvious lack thereof is important to note). I’m more interested in seeing potential for later awesome, the formation of story threads and first establishment of intriguing character relationships.
If you want to watch a great pilot episode, may I suggest Any J.J. Abrams Show Ever. Alias’ pilot is possibly one of the greatest episodes of anything ever. If you want to find new, fun shows to watch, wait until Week 2. Watch the pilot and then the first non-pilot episode in immediate sequence. That’s really the best way to get a feel for a show.
A lot of procedurals like to pretend that their pilot episodes are the beginning of a story by pulling clichéd little tricks like “This established team has a new member!” and trying to create tension around that scenario. It works at the beginning of a season of an already-established series, sure, but it’s an irritatingly false premise for pilot episodes because All The Characters Are New.
Tags: tv
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